Self
the central inner force, common to all human beings and yet unique in each, which is the deep source of growth
Self-Concept
who you think you are filtered through your own perceptions (labels used to describe yourself)
Attitudes
learned predisposition to respond to a person, object, or idea in a favorable or unfavorable way (likes/dislikes) (most changeable)
Beliefs
are ways in which you structure your understanding of reality - what is true and false for you. (most based on previous experience)
Values
Enduring concepts of good/bad, right/wrong. they are the most resistant to change and most difficult to identify.
Mindfulness
ability to consciously think about what you are doing and experiencing, rather than responding out of habit or intuition.
Subjective Self-Awareness
ability to differentiate from the environment - to know that you're a separate entity from all that's around you.
Objective Self-Awareness
ability to be the object of our own thoughts and attention
Symbolic Self-Awareness
ability to think about ourselves and to use language (symbols) to represent ourselves to others.
(4 Stage model:Maslow)
4 Stages of Symbolic Awareness (Maslow)
1. Unconscious Incompetence: you're unaware of your own incompetence. (don't know what you don't know - riding bike, math)
2. Conscious Incompetence: you have become aware that you're not competent (you know what you don't know)
3. Conscious Competence: you are aware that you know something but it hasn't yet become a habit.
4. Unconscious Competence: your skills become second nature to you.
William James: 3 Components of Self
1. Material
2. Social
3. Spiritual
Material Self
You are what you have" - total of all tangible things you own make up this self.
-body, possessions, home
Social Self
the part of you that interacts with others and the roles you assume
-mother, friend, student
Spiritual Self
consists of your thoughts and introspections about your values and moral standards. it is the essence of who you think you are and and your feelings about yourself apart form external evaluations
Looking-Glass Self
Cooley's term for the notion that we form our self-concept by seeing ourselves in a figurative looking glass and learn who we are by interacting with others (like looking in mirror at reflection) - often incorporate comments into our self-concept under 3 conditions
3 Conditions We Incorporate Comments into Self-Concept
1. if it's a repeat of something we've heard several times
2. if we perceive the other person to be credible
3. if the comments are consistent with other comments and our own experience
Attachments
the emotional and relational bond that you develop with your parents or primary care-giver.
3 Attachment Styles
1. Secure
2. Anxious
3. Avoidant
Secure Attachment
comfortable giving and receiving affection, experiencing intimacy, and trusting people.
Anxious Attachment
Received some affection from parents/caregivers but not enough. creates feeling uncomfortable in some relationships and experience anxiety about intimacy and the giving and receiving of affection.
Avoidant Attachment
those that consistently received too little nurturing. because of lack of adequate affection and emotional connection children may avoid relational intimacy with others because of discomfort and awkwardness of expressing or receiving intimacy
Association with Groups
associating with religious, political, ethnic, social occupational and other cultural groups are significant parts of identity (gay, lesbian)
Roles assumed
role labels imply certain expectations for behavior. Cultural conventions and expectations of each role play a major role in shaping our behavior and thus or self concept
(student, mother, boyfriend)
Adrogynous Role
the role is both masculine and feminine
Self-Labels
the ability to be self-reflexive (to think about what we're doing while we're doing it) encourages use of labels to describe who we are.
(talented, confident)
Personality
a set of enduring internal predispositions and behavioral characteristics that describe how you react to your environment (shy, anxious, gregarious, outgoing, humorous)
5 Big Personality Traits
1. Extraversion - outgoing, talkative
2. Agreeableness - friendly, compassionate
3. Conscientiousness - efficient, organized
4. Neuroticism - nervous, insecure
5. Openness - Curious, imaginative
3 Theories that explain chain of events that cause us to experience emotions
1. Common Sense Theory of Emotion
2. James-Lange Theory of Emotion
3. Appraisal Theory of Emotion
Common Sense Theory of Emotion
Emotions happen in the most common way that people think about emotions occurring. that they just happen and we don't have much choice in how we feel.
-something happens, you have affective reaction to event, you respond physiologically
James-Lange Theory of Evolution
Physiological Response determines emotional response. We respond physiologically before we feel the emotion.
-something happens, you respond physiologically, you experience emotion
Appraisal Theory of Emotion
labels determine what emotions are experienced. we appraise and label what we feel and can change the emotion by the way it's labeled.
-something happens, you respond physiologically, you decide how you will react to what's happened, you experience the emotion.
Self-Worth
an evaluation of who you are
Self-Efficacy
according to Bandura, it's your own belief in your abilities derived from a process of social comparison
Berne's 4 Life Positions
1. I'm okay, you're okay
2. i'm okay, you're not okay
3. i'm not okay, you're okay
4. i'm not okay, you're not okay
Facework
a person's positive perception of himself or herself in interactions with others
Politeness Theory (Brown & Levinson)
people have a tendency to promote a positive image of themselves and also have positive perceptions of others who treat them with respect and politeness.
7 Techniques to Transform Low Self-Esteem
1. positive self-talk
2. visualize a positive image of yourself
3. avoid comparing yourself with others
4. Reframe appropriately (redefine events/experiences from a different point of view)
5. develop honest relationships
6. let go of the past.
7. seek support (talk therapy)
Symbolic Interaction Theory (Mead)
we make sense of the world based on our interactions with others and that we cannot have a concept of our self-identity without interactions with other people
Self-Fulfilling Prophecy
prediction about future actions that's likely to come true because the person believes it will come true
Schutz 3 Primary Social needs
1. Inclusion - human contact/fellowship
2. Control - gives us stability & comfort
3. Affection - receive love, support, warmth, intimacy
Self-Disclosure
when we reveal info about ourselves and the primary way to establish and maintain interpersonal relationships
Johari Window - Who You Are - 4 Parts of Self-Disclosure
1. Open - known to self/others
2. Blind - not known to self/known to others
3. Hidden - known to self/not known to others
4. Unknown - not known to self or others
Communication Social Style
our general way of relating to others or of how we habitually communicate with others. Carl Jung described people according to thinkers, feelers, intuiters, and sensors (Myers-Briggs personality inventory)
Assertiveness
the tendency to accomplish a task by making requests, asking for info, and generally looking out for one's own rights and best interests. Sometimes called a "masculine" style.
Responsiveness
tendency to focus on the dynamics of relationships with others by being sensitive to their needs. "feminine quality