communication
is a 1)process uses 2)Messages to generate across 3)Contexts, Cultures, 4)Channels, and 5)Media
3 models of communication process
1. Linear (texting)
2. Interactive (teacher)
3. Transactional (shared)
interpersonal communication
communication between 2 or more people
intrapersonal
talking to yourself
interpersonal communication is
1)Dynamic (always changing)
2)Transactional (both parties contribute)
3)Dyadic (pairs of people)
4)Impact (influences relationships)
Buber names 2 ways of relating to others
1)I-thou (deepens bonds)
2)I-it leads to impersonal communication and disrespectful communication
principles of interpersonal communication
1) conveys Content and Relationship Information (yes sir). Meta-communication is communication about communication ex) he said
2)can be Intentional or Unintentional (facial expressions)
3) Irreversible (can't take back words)
4) Dynamic (constantly changi
Maslow's hierarchy of needs
1)Physical (food, shelter)
2)Safety
3)Social (need to belong)
4)Self esteem (feeling good about yourself)
5)Self actualization (feeling content with achievements)
Interpersonal communication fulfills 3 goals
1)Self presentation goals (good first impression)
2)Instrumental goals (ordering coffee)
3)Relationship goals (achieve friendships)
Interpersonal communication competence
Consistently communication Appropriately, Effectively, and Ethically
Appropriateness
matches Situational, Relational, and Cultural expectations. We judge how Appropriate our communication is through Self-Monitoring. High self monitors follow expectations.
Effectiveness
use communication to accomplish Self Presentational, Instrumental, and Relational goals
Ethics
Moral Principles that guide our behavior to others
Online Communication
Interaction by means of social networking sites (e-mail, text)
Improving Competence online
1)choose appropriate medium
2)don't assume online communication is more efficient
3)presume posts are public
4)posts are permanent
5)practice creating drafts (re-read e-mail)
Issues in Interpersonal communication
1)Culture
2)Gender and Sexual orientation (stereotypes)
3)Online communication
4)the Dark Side of interpersonal relationships (divorce)
Self
evolving composite of 3 components that develop over a lifetime:
1)Self Awareness
2)Self Concept
3)Self Esteem
Self Awareness
ability to view yourself as a unique person and reflect on thoughts, feelings, behaviors (texting someone who failed a test is supportive)
Social Comparison
Observing and assigning meaning to others behavior and then comparing it against your own.
Critical self reflection
What am I thinking and feeling? Why? How am I communicating?
Self Concept
overall perception of who you are influenced by Beliefs, Attitudes, and Values you have about yourself.
Looking glass self
how our self concept is influenced by what we believe others think of us. Changing your self concept is very difficult. Can lead to self fulfilling prophecies
Self Fulfilling Prophecies
predictions about future interactions. (thinking you are good at interviews, you end up doing good in interview, their reaction confirms your prophecy)
Self esteem
is the overall value, positive or negative that we assign to ourselves. It influences our interpersonal communication and how we approach others. Answers self awareness questions.
Self discrepancy theory
suggests self esteem is determined by how you compare to your ideal Self and Ought Self.To enhance self esteem you need to understand where it comes from (roots).
Ideal Self
Characteristics that you want to possess
Ought Self
Expectations from friends, family, cultural norms
Sources of self
Our selves are shaped by the power outside forces of gender, family and culture
Gender
social, psychological, and cultural attributes that characterize a person as male or female (women perceive themselves as connected to others)
Our interactions with caregivers shape 2 dimensions of our behavior
1)Attachment Anxiety: fear of rejection
2)Attachment Avoidance: prefer solitude, avoidance
4 attachment styles
1)Secure attach 2)Preoccupied Attach
3)Dismissive attach 4)Fearful Attach
Secure attachment
Preoccupied attachment
Dismissive attachment
Fearful attachment
comfortable with intimacy, seek relationships
desire closeness but fear rejection
close relationships are unimportant,self reliat
fear rejection and avoid relationships
Culture
set of beliefs, attitudes, values and practices shared by a group of people (similar to self concept). Belonging to an Individualistic or a Collectivistic culture shapes our selves. ex)Smith and Carlos wore black to represent black unity
Individualistic
Collectivistic
personal achievement of goals are praised
importance of belonging to a group, loyalty
Presenting your self
People know and judge the "you" who communicates with them Ex) Rick Welts, gay basketball player
Face
when communicating with others, you present a public self
Mask
public self designed to conceal private self. Sometimes your face is a mask because you want to be seen in a certain way by people. ex) to impress a date
Embarrassment
can result when information arises that contradicts your face ex) Ashlee simpson lip synching tried to remain face by blaming band
Online self presentation
ex) posting a sad picture online then changing to to a happy one because others were concerned. Another type of mask is "expert' in chat rooms. What others say about you online is more important than what you say about your self
Relational self
we carefully craft the presentation of our self to create interpersonal relationships with friends, workers. Exposing ourselves to others make us feel vulnerable
Social Penetration Theory
revealing the self to others involves peeling back layers ex)shrek
1) Outermost, peripheral layers (age, major, ethnicity)
2)Intermediate layers (music, food, movies)
3)Cenral layers (self awareness, self concept)
Opening yourself to others
Breadth: number of different aspect of self revealed each layer
Depth: how deeply into one another's self the partners have penetrated
Intimacy
feeling of closeness "union
Jahari Window
I) Public Area II) Blind Area
III) Hidden Area IV) Unknown area
Self-disclosure
revealing private information about your self to others.
1) Varies across cultures
2) Happens more quickly online
3) Promotes mental health
4) Occurs among men and women equally
Interpersonal Process Model of Intimacy
the closeness we feel toward others is created through self-disclosure and responsiveness of listeners
Improve self-disclosure skills
1. know yourself
2. know your audience
3. don't force others to disclose
4. don't presume gender preferences
5. be sensitive to cultural differences
6. go slowly
Perception
the process of Selecting, Organizing and Interpreting information from our Senses.
steps of perception
1) Selection: focusing attention on senses. Salience is degree to which something is noticeable to us
2) Organization: structuring selected information into a pattern. Punctuation is structuring information into a chronological sequence
3)Interpretation:
Attributions
explanations for others' comments or behaviors; answers "why" questions.
1) Internal attributions- thinking they are angry person
2)External attributions- they had a bad day
3 Errors in Attribution
1) Fundamental attribution error- he couldn't text back since his phone died but you think they are bad person
2)Actor observer effect- did something then regret it, we blame stress
3) Self serving bias- you do bad you blame teacher, you do good you blame
Uncertainty Reduction Theory
our focus is to reduce uncertainty about others. Get to know person to lessen uncertainty in certain situations
reducing uncertainty
1) Passive strategies - look them up online, observe them
2) Active strategies - ask people about person
3)Interactive strategies- talk to the person
Culture affects whether you see others as similar or different from yourself
Ingroupers- similar (hair, ethnicity, music)
Outgroupers- dissimilar
Perception and Gender
1% of communication behavior is influenced by gender. ex) women are nurturing, men ask women on dates
Personality "Big Five" OCEAN
1) Openness- open to ideas
2) Conscientiousness- assertive, focused
3) Extraversion- outgoing, social
4) Agreeableness- friendly, trusting
5) Neuroticism- insecure, unstable, bipolar
Implicit personality theories
are beliefs about different personality types. ex) if person is extrovert, they're are open, by using 1 trait you can fill out scale. we like the same traits in others we have in ourselves, we dislike others the traits we dislike about ourselves
Interpersonal Impressions
mental pictures of who people are. when you meet someone you decide if you like them or not. ex) Ted Bundy killer
Gestalts
first impression of people positive or negative. Gestalts are similar to schemata but gestalts refer to people.
-Positivity bias- positive feeling about person
-Negativity effect- emphasize negative information we learn (dangerous feeling about person)
Halo effect
positively interpreting what someone says or does because we have a positive Gestalt of them (you still like the person if they shoplift)
Horn effect
negatively interpreting the communication of people for whom we have negative Gestalts (find the worst in the person)
Algebraic Impressions
most accurate and refined of impressions. Add positive things of person, deduct negative things
Stereotyping
describes overly simplistic interpersonal communication (women are bad drivers, not true, but simple)
Improve your perception
1) Offer empathy: put yourself in their shoes
2)Embrace world-mindedness
3) Engage in perception checking
Empathy
feel into" others thoughts and emotions
1) Perspective taking: see things from other persons perspective
2) Empathetic Concern: considering another's perspective
World mindedness
acceptance of and respect toward other cultures' beliefs, values and customs.
(opposite) Ethnocentrism: "I think my culture is the best
Perception checking
1. check your punctuation- chronologically
2.check your knowledge-facts
3. check your attributions-avoid temptation
4. check perceptual influences-ingroupers
5. check your impressions-gestalt
Auditory, visual, tactile, olfactory, and oral are all examples of
channels
According to Maslow, which need to we fulfill after all other needs are met
self actualization
Interpersonal communication can be considered
intentional, unintentional, irreversible, dynamic
What is self monitoring
observing your own communication and the norms of the situation
Text messaging and e-mail often exemplify which type of communication model
linear
You have been dying to see a show with your gf but she wants to stay home, you go see it without her. What goal of effectiveness are you prioritizing
Instrumental
which of the following is NOT an element found in the linear communication model
feedback
If Frank generally ignores social norms in favor of "acting like himself", he is
a low self monitor
As an employee for a cell phone company, Zach sells many phones by misleading customers about monthly fees. What component of competent interpersonal communication is Zach lacking?
ethics
Intrapersonal communication involves
one person
You are meeting your partner's parents for the first time, you want to give a good impression. what type of interpersonal goal are you trying to accomplish
self presentational
one cannot communicate" means
communication can be unintentional
others may attach meaning to anything you say
others may attach meaning to anything you do
Collaboration is associated with which communication model?
linear, interactive, transactional
According to Buber, treating others as "objects which we observe, that are there for use and exploitation" is a characteristic of what type of relationship
I-it
Interpersonal communication competence is composed of
ethics, effectiveness, and appropriateness