I learned to stay quiet. I learned that nobody cared much. I learned that it was probably my fault anyway, and that what they were doing to me was perfectly okay. This is how it alters us. This is how we change
Maxine
You tell a teacher someone is calling you names. Blackie. Monkey girl. Golliwog. The teacher stares at you, exasperated, as if to say: Do you really expect me to do something about it? The next time you have a grievance, you look for a different teacher
Maxine
Mrs Hird kept her grey-green eyes on me, red pen still poised above the spelling test she'd be marking. "Well," she said slowly, "that's what you are. You can call him whitey if you like
Maxine/ Mrs Hird
A poison", "an assault on the mind
Maxine talking about racist remarks in the prologue
Somewhere along the line we give up counting. Somewhere along the line, we just give in. Somewhere along the line, we die a little
Maxine
I knew before I started big school that, for me, the playground would be a battlefield: a world divided into allies and enemies. At five and a half, racism had already changed me
Maxine
he didn't give a flying f**k what anyone thought
Maxine about Marcus
mixed race babies are so adorable
Marcus's mother when Maxine is at his house- Page-221
i learned to stay quiet", "nobody cared
Maxine
this is how it alters us. This is how we are changed
Maxine
go back to your own f***en country""f**k off, bitch""go drown your kid!""i should be used to this, i should know better
random guy in his car, in a "white ute
we said get off the track, blackies", "with your loser bikes
kids on the bike track
thats what you are, you can call him whitey if you like
Mrs Hird
Greg Adams call me dirty and disgusting
Greg to Maxine
nobody gives a shit about the abos", except maybe blackie over there
during indigenous week raising awareness a classmate makes this remark
F**K OFF BACK TO WHERE YOU CAME FROM""several weeks
Maxine receives letters in her bag from an anonymous person, we never find out who.
the animal he likened me too""like a possum paw""like a paw or something
Marcus (maxine's boyfriend) to Maxine when they were holding hands.
At five and a half, racism had already changed me
maxine
I was Coon. I was Jungle Bunny. I was Monkey Girl. I was Gorilla. I was Lubra Lips. I was N****r. I was Bl*ie, or Golliwog. I was Tar Baby. I was Dog Turd. I was Ape, Baboon or Big Lips. I was Steel Wool, Fuzzy Wuzzy or Camel Girl. I was Choco, Darkie or Jigaboo. I was Donkey Kong. King Kong. Sambo... Knuckle Dragger. Girl Dingo. Kaffir... Cockroach. I was Brownie, or Africana, or often just plain Nostrils. I was Niggie. I was Sooty, Boong, Thick Lips.'
maxine when talking about all the things people call her
we die...
a little
do you have normal feelings...
like normal people do?
I WAITED MONTHS for the light patches
on my face to lighten and spread
You're so sensitive...
just ignore them
Mick was the first boy who looked at me
like I was worth looking at.
Suddenly there's that
chest tightening feeling
the ugly abusive words
i said to Bhagita
such a lax approach to racism
we would report everything
blackie. Thats what you are. what are you? Blackie. thats right.
that pulsing red-black place inside my head
i didn't even like these girls
i'd somehow come to idolise
if you dont need to be here, there are other kids
who might actually need help
the trauma was too great
too consuming. too unmentionable
this is how it broke me
this is how i coped
i didnt know how to stop
clawing at myself" page 155
at night when no one was watching
i tried to claw my way out of my skin
because animals
dont count